15 Tips to Mentally Prepare You for Life in Panama

I've been asked a few times recently about satisfaction among expats in Panama and what seems to drive people to pack up and leave. That's a tough question to answer because each person has his or her own story. It might be the constant humidity, the slower pace of life, traffic (if they live in Panama City), missing family and friends back home, boredom, or a number of other things that bothers someone enough to cause them to call it quits. 

You're probably thinking, "Boredom? Wait, what, Chris? How could someone be bored? They've waited all their life to retire, lie on a hammock, and sip wine while rereading the entire Nichols Sparks collection." Very true. George R. R. Martin is more my style, but whatever the reading material, yes, believe it or not, life can get dull when you've got the entire day free. 

Yes, even this can get boring

I won't get into that too much, but let's just say that it might take some getting used to. And other things about Panama might take some time to adjust to. That's what this article is all about. This is about the things you can do in the U.S. or in Canada or wherever you're living now to get a head start on mental preparation for this wild adventure you're waiting to begin. Doing some of these things now might help ease your mind a little bit when you finally settle down in Panama for the long haul. Now, I may have mentioned some of these things in other posts, but maybe not...I've written a lot, lol, I don't remember. 

Oh and one other thing. None of this is meant to be negative. It's just me joking around. So don't get sensitive on me. 

1. Rooster Alarm - The Corn Flakes commercial is a liar. I found out quickly the first time I visited the interior of this country that roosters don't quietly meander up to the fence post, take a look around, inhale a deep breath, and let out one long rooster crow before feeling satisfied and retiring back to the coop. 

This rooster in Penonome might be your new alarm clock

At least not in Panama. So, if you plan to move here, a good thing to do to practice and prepare yourself for life in the interior of this country, is to download the rooster alarm tone for your phone. Make sure you set it for "loud" and make sure you set it for 4:30am. Then, when it goes off at 4:30, make sure you have the snooze set to go off every two minutes, and let it do this all day. 

In towns like Rio Hato or Penonome or maybe even Aguadulce, plus some neighborhoods in larger cities, roosters may be as common as dogs, so prepare yourself in advance so you don't go nuts later. 

2. Start throwing yourself into traffic - You can't talk about real life in Panama City without touching on the subject of traffic. I sat in traffic about three hours yesterday trying to pick Mar up from work. This isn't so different from many other major cities though. What is different, is the need to throw yourself in front of other cars. 

You may have heard of the "juega vivo" attitude in Panama. It's basically the game of life and means players win by staying ahead of everyone else, so "me first." Nowhere is this more obvious than on the road. It's very, almost extremely, rare that anyone will let you pull out in front of them in traffic. No one is going to invite you into their lane. You literally have to step on the gas and put yourself in front of someone. It's risky, but it's how things are done here.

You'll have to force yourself into this

So, to prepare for this, just start pulling out in front of oncoming traffic (okay please be safe when you do this). If you want to get used to Panama City traffic, drive it like you stole it. Turn every day life into Grand Theft Auto (please don't really go steal cars or yank people out of the driver's side door and smack 'em around). 

3. Hire people to do stuff for you - One thing people look forward to when they think of moving to Panama is the option to have a maid clean your house (every day or a couple of days a week). You may even opt to have a live-in maid. Plus, other hands-on work you've always hated can be contracted out. Hire a gardener to make your home front look snazzy or just pay someone to mow the lawn. Get someone to clean your pool for you. Oftentimes they'll even come right to your door and offer their services. 

These guys are awesome!!!

These things sound great, right? Well, believe it or not, they may take some getting used to. My wife's family has had a maid working for them for about 15 years. She's like part of the family. They asked her to work for us when we first moved to Panama to make our adjustment easier. I have to say, I wasn't prepared for that. I grew up cleaning my own dishes and doing my own laundry so suddenly having someone around to do it was odd. I felt bad letting someone else clean my stuff. But it's her job and she's getting paid for it. It's like telling the bank teller you'll count your own cash or telling the barber you'll cut your own hair. You just don't do it. 

If you want to prepare for this, hire a complete stranger to walk back and forth in front of the TV while you watch the morning news. Have them clean stuff and move things around so that you can't find them later, lol. Seriously. That's what happens. Eventually you learn the person's ways and you come to really appreciate the help, but at first it's really weird having someone in your home, especially if they're a live-in maid. 

4. Random honking - This is something else I've mentioned several times in the past. Panamanians honk their car horns all the time. They honk to let people know they're passing their driveway, they honk when they see a pretty girl (or a handsome guy), they honk to say, "Hey, up yours, pal!," and they honk to let you know it's okay to start driving again as soon as the light turns green. 

Taxi drivers are the worst

To prepare yourself for this, just start honking at everything. When you're sitting at the traffic light, keep your hand at the ready. Just wait for it. Then, as soon as it turns green, just lay your whole elbow against the horn. Let it rip. Make sure the people in front of you know you're in a hurry and they need to get the hell out of your way. 

Then, wait 'till you see an attractive person on the sidewalk and honk like a madman. Don't let people pull out of their driveways. Instead, speed up, and just as they're about to hit you, hold down your horn and laugh maniacally as you pass. Do it. Prepare yourself for Panama and enjoy the process, it's extremely liberating. 

5. Stop doing all your shopping at one place - No more Walmart, pal! Just give it up. Stop cold turkey. And no more Target either. Instead of buying a bunch of stuff that you kind of like from one store, start to appreciate the finer things in life. And when I say finer, I mean specialty items you can only get at one place (and I don't mean that special pumpkin puree you can only find at Whole Foods).

Stop buying your produce in supermarkets

In Panama, it's very common for people to go to their favorite bakery to get the bread they can't do without. Then, they'll stop by a business (that's actually in someone's home) that bakes the best cakes. Then, they'll go to a fresh produce market to pick up cheap fruits and vegetables. Then, they'll go to a supermarket to get their meats from their favorite butcher before heading over to the Mercado de Mariscos for all their seafood needs. Instead of buying bulk in one shop, start buying what you really like from different vendors. This is life in Panama. 

6. Embrace the cold shower - I swear only Anchorage, Alaska, and Chicago, Illinois rival Panama when it comes to freezing cold water (I've never been to Canada). Maybe it's because your body becomes so used to the hot humid atmosphere. Then, when water is lukewarm, it feels like it's minus 30. 

"But, Chris, I'll make sure I have a hot water heater," you might be thinking. Okay, fair enough. But will your friends and hotels and family members? Chances are, not everyone will have a hot water heater. I've stayed at hotels where my options were to take a freezing cold shower or trust the external water heater device that was plugged in above the mirror and had exposed wires. I went with the cold shower. 

So, to prepare for this, just go without hot water. Do what I do. Stand under the shower head. Hesitate for about five minutes. Remember that hot shower you had that one time at that one bed & breakfast. Think about the cold shower you took in that small community of Nancito in Chiriqui, Panama. Quietly cringe and debate how clean your body really needs to be today. Then, reach out, grab the cold water faucet and crank that sucker up as high as it will go. Next, scream, arch your back, and do that funky little, "Holy cow this is cold" dance. That's how it's done. 

Preparing for no water

And better yet. Fill a big jug full of cold water and take a slow shower under that little stream, just to prepare yourself for the frequent water outages that will occur. I woke up this morning to my daughters warning me the water was out. It happens quite frequently in my neighborhood as there's a lot of construction going on near our house. So, I went out to our emergency water tank we keep full outside, filled up some jugs, and the family showered, brushed teeth, and cooked using this water. 

7. Get used to Spanish subtitles - Whether you're watching TV in your home or out at the movie theater catching the newest flick, there's a good chance you'll be watching it with Spanish subtitles. At Panama movie theaters you have two options. You can either watch a movie that's dubbed in Spanish or watch it in original English format, but with Spanish subtitles. So if you're the type of person who refuses to watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon or Pan's Labyrinth simply because you can't stand seeing a movie with subtitles at the bottom, you might want to rethink your move (or stick to watching your DVD collection).

Even Netflix here in Panama automatically assumes you want Spanish subtitles on every show and movie. Of course, you can turn them off, but each and every show starts with subtitles. This is great if you have Panamanian family or friends around wanting to watch with you, it just might take some getting used to on your part.

The Walking Dead on Netflix

So, going forward, from now until you arrive in Panama, put subtitles at the bottom of your movies and turn the captions on on your TV. You don't have to read them (although Spanish subtitles might help you learn Spanish) but seeing them in front of you for two hours at a time will help you prepare yourself for your new movie-watching experience. 

8. Spanish speaking announcers - If you have basic cable here (and not some sort of special black box), you need to know ahead of time that nearly every sporting event you watch will come with Spanish-speaking announcers. 

Yes, this means NFL, UFC, boxing events, and even WWE wrestling. What's super annoying is that you might hear the English speaking announcers there in the background, but they're being overpowered by the Spanish-speaking announcers. The English words you crave are so close...yet oh so far away. If you're lucky, you might find a channel or two that actually plays the event in full English, but be ready to watch with Spanish subtitles. On a side note, you might also miss out on the American commercials during the Super Bowl. This drove me nuts last year. Instead of the cool, hilarious commercials I was waiting for, I got to watch a boring Panamanian version of a Miller Light commercial and maybe three other boring commercials that played over and over again.

If you like wrestling, get ready to listen to these guys

So, to prepare yourself, hire a Spanish-speaking friend to sit next to you on the couch as you watch any sporting event. Then, try really hard to hear the English-announcers while your friend shouts out everything he sees on the screen in Spanish. This should prepare you :)

9. Click "Save" a lot - Internet is high speed (ish) in Panama and electricity is dependable (ish) in Panama. I've been here just over five years and for some reason it seems that in the last two years, I've noticed a lot more power outages than before. This might just mean a short dip or it might mean going without power all day long. I live in Panama City and experience this, and I know people who live in towns in the interior and have complained it.

To prepare yourself for this, start constantly saving any work you do on your computer. Click save every minute or so. You may develop a nervous twitch, haha, but at least your work will not get deleted. 

And if you really want to prepare for this, just tell your spouse or an older child, to randomly, maybe once a week (okay power outages don't happen that often here, but it'll make practice more interesting) turn off the circuit breaker. They shouldn't let you know when they'll do this. You could be watching the NBA finals, taking a hot shower, shaving your face...whenever. Have fun with it. 

10. Cook a little more than usual - Not more often, but more as in the amount of food you cook. Let me explain. When I first moved here, I'd prepare about two pounds of ground beef, two packs of spaghetti, with two jars of sauce. I have four kids so this worked out great. 

That was until family started showing up. Suddenly, as soon as the spaghetti was finished, I'd hear someone at the door. It never failed. Family members showed up when they were invited and even when they weren't. In Panama, family and friends are everything. So be prepared for visitors and cook a little more. Now, I typically make three pounds of beef, three packages of spaghetti, and three jars of sauce. 

To prepare for this, just pretend a family of three is going to ring your doorbell at any moment. And if you don't want your food to go to waste, give it to the homeless or actually invite family and friends over for dinner. 

11. Loud music is a part of life - I don't think it matters where you live in Panama, you better be prepared to hear a variety of music at any hour of the day. At one point, when I lived in Villa Lucre (a small neighborhood in Panama City), there was a night club (disco) right behind my house. I swear reggaeton (Latin reggae) would start at 7pm and would continue until about 9am. Then, the neighbors on my street would play their music as well. One house was the home of an older couple who loved tipico music. So hearing an accordion was very common in the afternoon and early evening. The other house was the home of a young college guy who'd play club, pop, salsa, merengue, and reggaeton late at night on the weekends. 

You should have been there when I was painting the house. It was a Saturday afternoon and reggaeton, salsa, and tipico filled the air. I had my stereo outside and I cranked up my country music. It was an awful, strange blend of music as Charlie Daniels tried to out sing Samy y Sandra Sandoval and Marc Anthony. 

This is the site of my music melting pot paint job

How do you prepare for this? Well, the fun way is to wait until your spouse is sleeping (he or she is moving to Panama with you, right?). Then, creep outside of the bedroom window, pop in a Spanish-language cd (just go with one of Marc Anthony's salsa tunes, you can find his stuff anywhere), turn it all the way up, and push play. Then sit back and laugh as your spouse rolls out of bed and curses you out for the next half hour. 

12. Go fry crazy - I don't say any of this to pick on Panamanians. I love my new people. It's all just fun and games. But honestly, y'all fry everything. Panamanians fry bread (hojaldres), they fry pastries (empanadas), they fry chicken, they fry, they fry tuna, and they fry lunch meat. 

If you don't cook it in your own home, there's a good chance you'll be buying it fried somewhere on a Panamanian street. Okay, don't get me wrong, Panamanians make delicious soup and they do roast and rotisserie chicken and meat sometimes, but the majority of Panama food is fried. 

This is how it's done

So, to prepare for this, start frying everything. Fry breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I'll never forget when my mom-in-law visited the U.S. for the first time. She's an awesome cook. But I wasn't used to eating so much fried stuff. For breakfast she'd fry eggs, tortillas, hot dogs (salchichas), and even made french fries...for breakfast. My dad used to toss some potatoes in oil with a weekend dinner or something, but she made a pile of french fries with breakfast. It blew my mind. 

13. Be prepared for quirky road rules - Not only traffic congestion is an issue in Panama, but the addition of some strange road rules can make things confusing. Most of these come into play when Panamanian traffic police are doing all they can to ease that congestion. 

For example, on certain roads, at certain times of the morning or in the evening (rush hour periods), traffic patterns change. You have to be very careful making your way around the city and its suburbs at these times of the day. A road that usually goes in both directions, might suddenly change to a one-way, two-lane road between 6am and 8am. 

Look for signs like this

I've seen people pull onto these streets expecting it to be a regular road, like it usually is, only to come to a screeching halt just before smashing head first into an oncoming car. 

So, if you want to prepare for this, start going the wrong way on a one-way street. Just go for it. Drive straight at an oncoming car, then slam on your brakes at the last second. No, seriously, don't do that. Don't listen to me at all. It's safer that way. 

14. Be ready to hear new music - I don't mean new as in salsa and merengue and tipico and reggaeton. Sure, those styles of music may be completely foreign to you, and you can easily prepare yourself by purchasing a few cds you wouldn't normally listen to.

What I'm talking about is music in English you've probably never heard in your life. I don't know any of the radio stations off the top of my head (as I've stopped listening to most of them and have gone back to my cds and mp3 mixes), but I can tell you that the few times I've tried to find English music on the radio, I was shocked by what I found. 

It seemed that the only music I could find (in English) other than the newer pop and dance stuff that's mixed in with Spanish music, was 80s music. And I don't mean, "You can dance if you wanna..." or "Walk like an Egyptian..." I'm talking the strangest, oddest tunes I've ever heard. I was alive in the 80s and I happen to like 80s music, but I'd never heard 9 out of 10 of the songs played on the radio. I kept thinking, "Where did they get this crap?" It's like the DJs flew to Borat's country and asked what American or British music they listened to in the 80s. 

Maybe something from this soundtrack

So, to prepare for this, bring lots of music you enjoy with you and be ready to listen to a lot of music online. And if you really want to prepare for that strange 80s music you'll hear, maybe find a VCR, go to all your local pawn shops and pick up any 80s movie you've never heard of, and watch them just for the music. Good luck!

15. Religion returns to schools - Yes, Panama is doing it right, in my opinion (sorry if you disagree). Religion is a part of the school system here in Panama. If you go to a public school or a private school, there's probably a 99% chance your child will be taking a religion (and ethics and values) class. And, of course, if your kids go to a Catholic school, or a Jewish school, or a Muslim school, there's 100% chance they'll be learning religion. So, if you have school-age children, be mentally prepared for this. There's no escaping it. God isn't being taken out of the national anthem here and God isn't being taken out of the schools. I hope this doesn't turn off any fans/readers. We all have the right to our opinions and I respect yours whether I agree with or not. But religion in schools is a fact here. 

16. What happened to our fortunes? - Okay, one extra, and on a much lighter note. Well, not really since I love fortune cookies. 

Seriously, do it. 

No more fortune cookies. Seriously. It's sad, I know. I guess fortune cookies are a wacky gringo thing because Panama has a lot of Chinese residents, and quite a few Chinese restaurants, but I've yet to see a freakin' fortune cookie. And I'm sorry to say there really is no way to prepare for this. You just have to accept the heartbreak as it comes.

Well, that's it for my 15 Tips to Mentally Prepare You for Life in Panama. I hope you learned a few things and had some fun in the process. If you feel that some things are missing, such as preparing for green olives being in most of your food, check out my other articles, like 10 Things You Will Hate About Panama by clicking HERE or 15 Quirky Things About Panama And Its People by clicking HERE. 

Don't forget to head over to http://www.PanamaForReal.com to check out all the other tips and tricks I've written about living here and to see the videos, something you're completely missing out on if you're only reading The Stay at Home Gringo. 

Thanks again for reading,

Chris

The Real Deal on Paying Your Bills In Panama

When you first move to Panama, you'll no doubt feel a little lost. Things are going to be a bit different here. Setting up your utilities and cable TV and Internet...all that stuff might be somewhat of a challenge, especially when dealing with the language barrier. Then, once you have everything set up, there's still that pesky task of  paying your bills. That is, unless you're one of those rich expats who move here and pay an assistant to take care of everything for you. Now that would be nice, but for most of us, it's not reality. Paying bills sucks no matter where you're located, so let's talk about how it differs here in Panama from what you may be used to.

I've been here so long now that when I started out writing this, I realized that I'd forgotten how strange life was when I first moved to Panama. Most differences are no big deal, but even the smallest oddities can make you feel so out of place. First, you have to realize there's no normal mail service here. You won't see a mailman in his short blue shorts and high socks marching from door to door. It's so different here in that aspect. In Panama, the companies send out their own errand boys/people to drop off your bill. You might be sitting in your living room and hear someone yell out, "Agua!" That actually happened yesterday at my house. I was sitting on the couch, working on my next book, when someone walked by and shouted "water" through my open window.

I guess I'm not usually home when the water bill is dropped off because it kind of took me by surprise. What do you yell back when someone shouts water? At least if it had been, "Marco!" I could have replied with, "Polo!." But agua? I felt all my cool points dissipate as I struggled to produce a witty comeback. The guy outside, unlike the ones who ride by and sell fresh produce, pick up appliances, fix your shoes, shout out political taunts, and provide all other sorts of door-to-door services, wasn't simply selling water like one might think. Turns out, he was just warning us that he was dropping off the bill. 

This is how your bills will show up

I looked outside and there it was, tucked safely in the door handle (sometimes you'll find your bill stuffed into the metal bars on your window). Most people in Panama don't have a mailbox.

So, once you get your hands on a bill, what now? You don't just rip off the bottom portion, sign a check, lick an envelope, toss it back into the box, and raise the red flag. Those days are long gone my friends. I've been out of the U.S. for over five years now, so that may not even be the way it's handled there now. I know I used to pay all my bills online. 

I got the idea for this short article (short because it's pretty easy and doesn't need a lot of detail, but you know me, I'm always long winded and will probably stretch this out with a story or two) when a reader sent me an email asking about paying bills in Panama. Apparently, he'd spent some time chatting with an elderly Panamanian man who'd explained to him that paying bills in Panama always requires that you actually visit the company you need to pay.

You can go directly to the source in Chitre and pay your water bill here

Hearing that didn't surprise me. It seems to be that Panamanians over the age of maybe 50, either don't trust the other systems in place, don't have the technical know how, or just have no idea other avenues exist. When I first moved to Panama and was a lot less knowledgeable than I am now, I listened to my father-in-law when it came time to pay the electric bill. Remember, Mar left Panama when she was 18 and married me shortly after, so she didn't know the ways of the bill-paying-Panamanian world either. With our feet planted firmly on foreign soil, we were both learning the ways of our new world, and unfortunately under the direction of someone with this old school train of thought.  

Dad-in-law insisted that I needed to go to the actual electric company to pay the bill. So I did. I wasn't gonna argue. I didn't know there were alternatives, so what was there to argue. So there I stood, in line, without about 20 other people lined up along the sidewalk, waiting to get into the office to pay the bill. Every time someone exited the building, someone else would be allowed entry. Finally, I made it to the front of the line, where the security guard allowed me to enter, just to find that the line kept going, snaking back and forth all the way to the counter. At least the inside was air conditioned. When I finally paid, the girl behind the counter stamped the bill with the date, the amount paid, and all that other good stuff, and I was on my way.

It wasn't a complicated process, but man, it was a lengthy and tedious one. It turned out to be an embarrassing one too as I was still struggling with the difference between "hale" and "empuje," or in English, the dreaded "pull" and "push" stickers you see on glass doors. I've never had luck with the push/pull conundrum. Even in English, there's a 99% chance I'll make the 50% choice wrong and end up running into the door. Well, that's exactly what happened at the electric company, packed with Panamanians waiting in line, when I went to exit and I empujed (think I just created a word) rather than haled and smacked right into the glass door. A buddy of mine who was behind me in line came out a minute later to rub in how hard everyone was laughing after I'd left. Good times. I love being a gringo rodeo clown.

Looks something like this

So, after this ridiculous, time-wasting experience, I kept thinking, "Man, there has got to be an easier way to pay bills." Turns out there was. And there still is. Here are the ways you can pay your bills here in Panama. Of course, if I miss any, I invite readers to write in the comments section to keep us all in the loop.

Go Directly to the Source: 

As I just mentioned, this is the only way many older Panamanians will pay their bills. Even after I'd discovered other ways to do it, my father-in-law insisted I go directly to Ensa (the electric company) or Idaan (the water company), etc.

"But why?" I asked.

"Because you have to. You have to make sure it goes through immediately," Dad-in-law explained.

And that was that. It's kind of like insisting that you have to go to Blockbuster to rent a video because you don't trust Redbox or Netflix. 

There's no doubt that handing over cash and getting a stamped "paid in full" receipt in return is the safest route, but it's definitely not the most convenient. So what other ways are there to pay bills? 

Multi Pagos (and the other small pay stations) - 

It wasn't until I'd been here awhile that I noticed all the people standing in line at these little pay boxes in the Super 99 grocery stores. Then I noticed something similar in the Rey supermarkets. I realized I didn't have to go straight to the source to pay the bills. I could just take care of it at the supermarket. That wasn't as easy as paying online, but it was a heck of a lot easier than going to three to four different buildings to pay the bills.

Pay your bills, use Western Union, and other stuff at these Multi Pagos

These multi pay stations have a database with most companies you'd need to pay. The easiest way to pay is to bring your actual bill with you. And trust me, it's best to bring the most recent bill. Some of them won't let you pay with an old bill even though it has your account number on it. I found this out one time when I was a little bit behind on my electric bill. I hadn't received the newest bill, but I was late on the old one, so I took it in and tried to pay. They wouldn't take it. I had to wait until my next bill came out, then take it in and pay with the updated bill.

The funny thing is, even if you don't have your bill on you, you can usually fill out a form like the one you see in the following picture. If you don't have your bill with you, make sure you know what the NIC # is, pronounced like NICK, as you won't be able to pay your bill without this valuable piece of info:  

Just a simple form, requesting loads of info

If you take a look at the photo, you'll see that quite a bit of info is requested on this form. You may also recognize this info, as I've used it before in one of my supermarket tips articles. It goes great with this article too, so I'm sharing it again. Here's what all those questions on the form mean in English: 

Cia a pagar = Company you are paying (like Ensa for electric, Cable Onda for cable, etc.)

Fecha = Today's date.

No. De Cuenta a Pagar = The NIC or customer number.

Nombre del Cliente = Your name (or whoever's name the account is under).

No. Cedula = The cedula is like the social security number in the United States. It's a Panamanian's ID number. If you don't have a cedula you'll use the number on your immigration card or your passport number. 

Cheque/Efectivo = Put the amount down that you're paying either with a check (cheque) or cash (efectivo). 

Escriba en letras Total del Pago = Here you write out the total amount. I don't speak/write Spanish yet (not very well anyways) so I usually leave this part blank and they fill it out for me. ;)

Banco/No. Cheque = If you're using a check to pay, write the bank name and check number here. 

No. Telefono = Your telephone number.

See, if you have your bill with you you won't have to worry about all that. They'll just stamp the bill and give it back to you as a receipt that you paid.

My only complaint about using these multi pago stations, and it's going to be the same with any form of payment where your physical presence is required, is the amount of people you'll find in line, especially at rush hour. Early mornings, lunch breaks, and right after work (especially on or around the quincena, or payday, you'll find a lot of people lined up to pay bills, send/receive money through Western Union, or to engage in one of the other many services these multi pagos provide. Your best bet is to go in sometime around 10am or maybe 2pm.   

Epago

Similar to these multi pay stations you find around town, are the Epagos, like you see in the photo below.  

This is the ePago in Penonome

These Epago buildings can be found in just about every town in Panama. I even saw one in Las Tablas, which is what I'd consider one of the smallest, most third-world towns in Panama. These are run pretty much the same way as the multi pay stations. You can go into this one building and pay just about anything you'd need to pay.

The Western Union at Los Pueblos

In addition to these, you can also go into some other places like Western Union and pay your bills. The photo above is the Western Union at the Los Pueblos shopping center in Panama City (technically the Juan Diaz area I guess).

This pay station was inside of a small supermarket off of Via Brasil in Panama City

Western Union isn't the same as ePago, so these smaller substations aren't necessarily part of ePago, but they're other convenient places to pay your bills. You just have to find the place closest to you. If you want to see what services can be paid at the actual ePago locations, check out this list: http://www.epago.com.pa/pagar.html.

Bank Online

Perhaps the easiest way to pay your bills, and the method I definitely prefer, is to pay your bills through your bank's online system. Not all banks will have this available, but when they do, it makes life so much easier. We bank with Banco General and pay all of our bills online through their system. 

I prefer the bank's online pay system

You just look up the company you want to pay, put in your account number to register, then remember to go back each month and pay your bills. Once you've set it up once, the account numbers and companies you need to pay should remain in the system, making it easier the next month as you'll only need to put in the amount you'd like to pay.

And if you need a quick refresher on what it takes to open a bank account in Panama, check out the video I put together, The Real Deal Report on Banking in Panama by clicking HERE.  

Now, while my father-in-law loves to have that sheet of paper in hand with the stamped "paid and received" notice right there on the slip, I'm fine with having it recorded in my bank's system. I think it's easier that way. I can lose a sheet of paper. It's much easier for me to check my account history online.

***UPDATE on 8/28/14*** After publishing this article, readers and friends, Todd B. and Emma V. both wrote to tell me about a service I hadn't heard about. It's called Multientrega. Apparently, these people will come to your house, take your cash and bill, give you correct change, then go pay your bill and bring the receipt back to you. And the cost is not bad at all. Todd says he pays less than $10 (which when you consider the cost of gas or taxi and the time it takes to stand in line to pay your bills is not bad at all). I haven't personally used the service, but Todd and Emma are serious people, so it sounds like a good alternative to the madness that can come with paying your bills in Panama. Here's the Facebook page for Multientrega: https://www.facebook.com/multientrega

I know this post was shorter than usual, but it's fairly simple and I just wanted to clear it up a little for anyone thinking it was difficult to pay bills in Panama. 

Hope this helps guys.

Thanks for reading, 

Chris

And don't forget to go to http://www.PanamaForReal.com. 

Also like us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/PanamaForReal

And like, subscribe, share us on Youtube at: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6N7Ih2bjD0FjOBnDg_-Flg

Panama Can Be A Scary Place

When you think of voodoo and black magic and ghost stories, you probably think of New Orleans on the home front, and maybe Jamaica or Haiti on the foreign one. Panama typically stirs up images of basking in the seaside sun with the smell of coconut scented suntan oil wafting through the air. Usually, it's not Panama that comes to mind when you think of terrifying tales. However, I have to tell you, since moving here, I've discovered that Panama has a dark side, or at least a strangely shadowy (almost wrote sinister, but that sounds too evil) side. 

I don't want to frighten you with this article. That's definitely not my intention. Life in Panama is great. But Panama has a lot of history, and just like Valley Forge, Pennsylvania or Salem, Massachusetts, anyplace with history is likely to have some creepy stories. 

Not this kind of scary...but scary

For being a country with its roots planted so firmly in the Catholic faith, it's interesting how many Panamanians believe there are witches and other not-so-friendly forces roaming about. This place isn't like what's depicted in the movie The Serpent and the Rainbow or anything, but Santeria is practiced by some here in this country. You know, like the Sublime song, "I don't practice Santeria. I ain't got no crystal ball." Santeria is considered a religion, but also has a dark side (like voodoo, which it's often compared to). 

Not this kind of voodoo (photo from Amazon.com)

I'm not saying every Panamanian believes in all this freaky stuff, but I can assure you that if you ask 5 Panamanians if they've witnessed something supernatural or just plain spooky, at least 3 of them will be able to tell you about something that either happened to them personally, or to a friend or family member. Even in the school folklore class, the kids are tasked at least once a year with bringing in reports on Panama's scary legends. 

At some point in the future, I'll write a part 2 to this article and tell you some of the scary stories I've heard from others, but for now, I'll focus on some of the strange happenings I've encountered here. 

When we first moved to Panama, Mar and I rented a two-story house. It was a strange house, with 3 bedrooms upstairs and 2 living rooms downstairs. The back wall of the second living room, which led out to a patio, wasn't a solid wall. Instead, it was a barred-up, screened-in sliding door. So no matter how secure we were in the house, it always felt a little bit strange, like we were way too vulnerable. It did allow a decent breeze to flow through the house though. Oh and there was a back room right next to that door that we used as a toy room for the kids. 

That's the back door/wall I'm talking about

Almost immediately after moving in, we started noticing strange occurrences. Now, I'm not crazy. I've seen some odd things in my life, but I'm definitely not the kind of person to quickly blame everything on the supernatural. And I know many people reading this will automatically chalk it all up to an overactive imagination, but I can assure you, these things were not normal, not delusions, and not make believe. Believe it or not, that's up to you. 

Sightings

First, came the sightings. Victoria, my youngest daughter, who must've been about 5-years-old at the time was the first to mention the woman in black. Mar was upstairs napping with the boys one night, while the girls were in their bedroom. The phone rang downstairs so Victoria raced down the stairs to answer it (she'd been waiting for her cousin to call). After a few moments downstairs, she came screaming up the stairs, waking Mar up and freaking out her sister. 

"What is it, baby?" Mar asked.

"I was on the phone," Vica replied, "And I saw a woman in black walking through the kitchen. She made the bags move."

She was talking about plastic grocery bags we'd had hanging from the cabinets. We were going through an ant problem at the time, so we hung any sweets and bread in grocery bags high up so the ants couldn't get to them.

Christina with the boys in THAT HOUSE

Shortly after Victoria's sighting, the nanny, Christina, who has been with Mar's family for about 15 years, started mentioning seeing a man in black. The first time was after she saw the shadow of a man walk into the kitchen. 

Then, another time she saw the same dark shadow walk out of the kitchen and into the living room. She followed it until she saw it disappear on the stairs. 

A third time, she'd fallen asleep on the living room couch. When she woke up, she glanced to her right, and there, in the dining room, was the dark shadowy man, just staring at her. She jumped up and he disappeared. 

The boys were infants when we moved to Panama, right around the 9-month mark. We lived in that house for several years, so by the time we left, they were old enough to walk and talk. One night, while Mar and Nico were headed upstairs, they passed the kitchen and were about to round the corner to the stairs when Nico froze in place and looked terrified. Mar crouched down to see what was wrong with him and he said.

"Mama, a woman is in the kitchen." 

Mar figured it must've been her mom in the kitchen as she was visiting at the time. "It's probably just Abuela," she said.  

Nico shook his head and said, "It wasn't Abuela. There's a black woman in the kitchen."

Nico ain't afraid of no ghosts!

Marlene looked back and didn't see anything. Later, when Mar asked the owner of the house about it, she kind of jokingly said, "Oh yeah, the man in black has been there since I was a kid. He won't harm anybody." 

It Gets Stranger 

When we fist moved into that house, the boys were just learning to crawl, and definitely weren't able to climb out of their cribs. One night, I was hanging out with the kids downstairs when Nico fell asleep. I carried him upstairs to the boys' bedroom where the crib on the left wall was Nico's and the crib against the right wall was Matteo's. I am 100% certain I placed Nico in the correct crib because when I went to lay him down, he grabbed one of the bars and I had to kind of pry his fingers off so he wouldn't hurt himself in his sleep. I covered him up with his blanket, then headed downstairs. 

Maybe 30-minutes later, Matteo fell asleep. So I carried him upstairs. When I went to place him in his crib, Nico was there. He wasn't old enough to climb out of his crib and even if he was, he could never have reached up and pulled himself into the crib on the opposite wall. I thought it was really strange, but just pushed it out of my head and went back downstairs. But I was positive I'd placed him in the correct crib in the first place. It really bothered me. 

Then it happened again, on a different night, but the other way around. Matteo was in the wrong crib. This happened several times. Even Mar witnessed it, so it wasn't just my forgetful mind. One time, I wasn't even home. Mar was with her mom in the house and went to check on Nico who'd been sleeping upstairs in his crib. When she opened his bedroom door, his crib was empty. 

Panic hit her right away because he'd never crawled out of the crib. She looked under the cribs and around the room and he was nowhere in sight. By that point she was getting really scared. Her first thought was that someone had kidnapped him, but how could they? His window was sealed up tight with bars on the outside (typical security in Panama's older neighborhoods). 

She and her mom searched the house, calling out his name. She checked all of the rooms once, then twice. On the second round, she entered my daughters' room, and just happened to see Nico's little toes peeking out from beneath Estefania's bed. 

Mar dropped to her knees and had to lie down on the floor because the space between the bed and the floor was tiny, so narrow that it would have taken some effort for him to slide under there (not something you'd easily do in your sleep). She could see Nico, but he was too far away for her to reach, so she rubbed on his foot and called out his name. Mar says she'll never forget the look on his face when he opened his eyes. He was terrified, like he had no idea how he'd gotten beneath her bed. 

One other time, I went into the boys' bedroom to check on them in the middle of the night, and both cribs were pushed away from the walls, at the same odd angle, in the center of the room. That's when I really started to believe something was going on. 

Seriously!

At the time, I was a trainer at one of the call centers here and during a break I kind of mentioned it to the people in my class. These were all adults. As soon as I started talking about it, they all got very animated and enthusiastic about personal horror stories. They started telling me about witches and asked if we'd baptized the boys. At that time, we hadn't. We'd baptized the girls, but wanted to wait until we'd moved to Panama to baptize the boys, and just hadn't gotten around to it. 

"You need to baptize them," one woman told me. 

"Okay," I said, not realizing the urgency. 

"Seriously," she said. "Strange things happen in Panama to children who are not baptized." 

"Come on," I said.

"Really," she replied. "Witches go into the homes of babies that haven't been baptized. They pick up the babies while they're sleeping, and suck on their bellybuttons."

I looked around the room, and no one seemed to think the story was strange. In fact, it kicked up a whole discussion about witches and other evil entities. I later told Mar about it and she, who has heard some wild stories, said she'd never heard the one about the bellybutton-munching witches. 

Mar wanted to get the boys baptized as soon as possible, but we still weren't in a major rush. Then, a couple more things happened which kind of pushed up the date a little. 

One night, while Mar was alone with the kids (as a trainer I had to teach a lot of night classes), she'd just put them to bed when she went downstairs to get a snack. She immediately felt that something wasn't right. You know that feeling you get when the hair stands up on the back of your neck? When you feel like you're being watched? Mar felt that she wasn't alone. She grabbed her snack and went upstairs with it. 

A few minutes later she heard the sound of someone talking. It was a soft, creepy voice far off in the distance. She checked on the kids and everyone was okay, so she crept out onto the staircase and looked down at the dark living room. She could heard the voice and it sounded like it was somewhere in the house. She went back to her room and grabbed her rosary. After praying and forcing herself to relax, she got a bit angry and decided that she was the woman of the house and would not be afraid in her own home. So she got up and went downstairs, flipping on every light along the way. 

Once downstairs, she still couldn't figure out where the sound was coming from, but she recognized it. It was a battery-operated Elmo doll we'd bought the kids for their birthday. It was repeating one of its catch phrases over and over again. Mar followed the sound into the second living room where she realized it was coming from the back toy room. 

She turned on the living room and bathroom lights, but the problem was the motion light outside that large sliding door I mentioned earlier was not working right, so the back patio was pitch black, and the toy room light, for some reason, could only be turned on from a switch inside the closet, at the back corner of the room. Mar didn't have flashlight, so she crept past the sliding door, glancing over her shoulder every couple of seconds, half expecting to find the shadow man peering in at her from the patio, and tried to see where the doll was without actually entering the toy room. It was impossible. She needed to enter the room.

And that damned doll kept repeating that creepy phrase. Something about wanting to play. Over and over again, taunting her. 

She finally convinced herself she was brave enough to do this, took a deep breath, and ran to the back closet. She flipped on the light and saw nothing out of the ordinary. Only three large boxes full of toys. Then the Elmo stopped talking. It just completely stopped. Mar wasn't sure which box it had been coming from. She waited to see if it would start blabbing again, but it didn't. So she started digging through the boxes until she finally found it at the bottom of a box.

She picked up the Elmo and held it at eye level. Suddenly it started laughing and then said, "Goodbye." She hurried out of the toy room, opened up its back panel, and yanked out the battery. She threw the doll into the garbage and ran upstairs. And the talking started again. The battery-less Elmo was calling out with its catch phrase. Mar called me and then called her mom and asked her to come over and stay with her. 

Take that freaky Elmo (we know how to get our revenge, piñata style)

At that point, Mar was completely freaked out and wanted to get out of the house, but we needed to find someplace else to go. We set everything up to baptize the boys, but her temporary fix was to bless the house. So she got a bottle of holy water and her rosary and we went to each room of the house, splashing holy water in the corners of the rooms while she read a passage from her Bible. When we got to the boys' room and she started blessing it, we suddenly heard a loud bang from downstairs.

I ran downstairs to the kitchen and found Coca-Cola all over the kitchen walls and floor. We'd had a big, plastic-wrapped case of 2-liter bottles sitting on the floor, drinks for an upcoming birthday party. One of the bottles, while still in the plastic wrap, completely burst all on its own. The bottle had exploded and soda was everywhere. Again, each of these things happening on its own wouldn't seem like a big deal, but added together, they're kind of strange don't you think? Shortly after this, we baptized the boys and things started to settle down. Soon after, we moved out of the house and into our next story. 

Baptizing the boys

The next house we rented was definitely in need of some love and care. The owner of the place warned us prior to moving in, that the guy who'd rented it before us was a strange bird. He'd cemented up one of her bedroom windows and I think she said he'd painted one of the other windows black. She was convinced that he'd been selling drugs out of the house, but never had proof. When she'd evicted him, he got mad and ripped out most of the cabinets and light fixtures. 

We went ahead and took the place because we needed to move out of the first house as someone wanted to buy it (and we were tired of being stalked by shadowy figures and dealing with soda-exploding mayhem). So, I painted the front of the house and all the walls inside, cleaned it up, and made it livable for our family, while the owner had the cement knocked out and the window re-installed. Most of the issues with that house (and ultimately the reason we moved out) were electrical and plumbing issues. We had some leaking in several places in the roof when it rained. But other strange things started to go on too. 

Here's the house after I painted it

It began with strange sounds on the roof at night. It's common to hear birds and small animals traipsing across the roof, especially since many of the roofs on the typical Panamanian homes are so thin, but this was different. These were heavy footsteps. This sounded like a person was running across the roof. 

Right behind our house was a small river. Many Panamanians believe, or have at least heard the stories, that witches gather by the rivers at night. Another story is that they run across peoples' roofs at night. 

Well, whether or not it was a witch, I can't exactly say, but I can tell you that it was loud enough and happened often enough, that it woke me up most nights. Then, sometimes I'd heard crying outside my bedroom window. It sounded far away, but it was a strange noise, like a mix between someone crying and someone laughing. It was definitely creepy.

I went to bed one night, right after hearing the strange crying, in boxers and a T-shirt, how I sleep most nights. I've never sleepwalked in my life. Never. I've NEVER done it. I might mumble in my sleep and I sometimes grind my teeth, but I never sleepwalk. And I'm a very light sleeper, so even the softest of noises or movements will jolt me from my sleep. 

I woke up late that night, on the living room couch, completely dressed, shoes on and all, with my car keys in my pocket. I remember sitting up and feeling confused, but really groggy at the same time. I wanted to get up and go back to bed, but I felt exhausted, like so exhausted that I couldn't get up. It was almost like I'd been drugged or something. I laid back down and went to sleep and woke up in the morning, still fully dressed. Mar seemed more scared than I was. I was really confused, but she was actually scared.

In addition to these little odd things going on, the most significant change was in our attitudes. Mar and I argued more than ever in that house and even people who visited seemed to be in a bad mood as soon as they entered the house. My mother-in-law and the owner of the house were great friends before we moved in, but by the time we moved out, were practically at each other's throats. One of my wife's cousins visited once and told us later that as soon as she entered the house she suddenly felt drained of energy. 

Check out these dark clouds rolling in over that house 

(like in the Poltergeist movie, or any other stormy day in Panama, lol)  

Eventually, we moved out, and as soon as we did, everything started to go back to normal. Mar and I got along a lot better, my mother-in-law and the owner of the house went back to being friends, it all just smoothed out. About a year later, the owner of the house stopped by to visit. She was trying to sell that house. She came by to tell us how glad she was that we'd left when we did. Apparently, when she started fixing up the house to sell it, the workers removed the tile on the ceiling and you'll never believe what they found.

I get chills just thinking about it. Above our bedroom, where Mar and I slept every night, there was an altar, one of those evil Santeria altars right above our bed. When we lived in the house, I couldn't figure out why this one light switch in the hallway wouldn't work. I'd changed the bulb and everything and eventually just figured it was another electrical issue. Wrong. The light switch was working just fine. Only it was turning on the lights at the altar in the ceiling. So there I was turning on the altar and turning it off again, over and over. 

Well, that's the end of the crazy stories I have for now. I was all for buying used houses before, but I think in the future I'll stick with new construction. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have a long punch list of things to fix than an altar above my bed. Just sayin'. 

Thanks for reading,

Chris

15 Free Phone Apps That Come In Handy In Panama

I don’t pretend to be a technology expert. In fact, quite often I’m the complete opposite. I was in no rush to go from the tired old flip phone to a Blackberry and was even slower getting to the Smart Phone. I was eventually bitten by that pesky little modern tech bug, and I’m ready to finally admit that not only am I a fan, I’m hooked on these apps. When so much of your life is a big question mark, anything that simplifies things a bit is greatly appreciated. 

Back in the days, people would come to Panama with hand drawn maps (seriously, I met an expat couple who’d done this) or venture out of Panama City only with an English-speaking guide. 

Now, through the invention of so many phone applications, things like dealing with the dreaded language barrier, finding a ride, communicating with people back home, and even finding out what’s playing in English at the closest movie theater are super easy. All that info and more is available with the push of a button. I want to show you 15 FREE phone apps that could make your life much easier here in Panama.

Keep reading for some helpful apps

Some people reading this will be very familiar with some of the apps mentioned in this article, while some will discover something new. Many people reading this may not be comfortable with new technology at all and find Smart Phones to be an alien universe. I’m here to tell you that you will be blown away by how easy it is to download and use these apps and you’ll be just as surprised by how necessary you’ll start to believe them to be. 

And getting data on your phone is not nearly as expensive as you’d think here in Panama. I paid over $100 per month back in Ohio, and that was only for some talk time…SOME talk time, plus my minute count ticked away with incoming calls too (that doesn’t happen here, only outgoing calls eat up your talk time). 

In Panama, you have many phone options, which should probably be discussed more in a different article, but you might pay as little as $10 per month for data. If you switch to WiFi whenever you’re in a hot spot, you can use all the data you want…for free. 

Alright, let’s get to these apps. I didn’t put Google Translate or Google Maps on the list because I think they’re kind of a given and are automatically included on a lot of Smart Phones. Both of those apps do work great.

In addition to the ones that’ll help you out here in Panama, I’ll also throw in a few extra apps that I just appreciate. So really I’ll be telling you about 20 or so different apps.

1. Whatsapp

I’ve mentioned Whatsapp several times on Panama For Real because it truly is a way of life here in Panama. Without Whatsapp, communication as we know it would be lost. Ok, maybe it’s not that drastic, but even with other social media apps available, Whatsapp is still the most widely used in Panama. 

What is Whatsapp? It’s an application you download for free (actually I think you pay a one-time $1 fee). Whatsapp then allows you to chat for free (as long as you have a data plan from your cell phone provider or are in a WiFi ready area) with people in your phone address book/contact list who’ve also downloaded the Whatsapp app.

I text message my mom and brother in San Diego, my other brother on the east coast of the U.S., and everyone here in Panama. It makes communicating with friends and loved ones easier than you ever thought imaginable. You can also record little voice messages and send them along, so if I don’t feel like typing, I can hold down the microphone button and send a message from my kids to Grandma Jackie in San Diego in seconds. It’s amazing.

2. Glide

For anyone wanting to take it a step further, Glide works in pretty much the same way Whatsapp does, by accessing people in your contact list who’ve also downloaded the Glide app. With Glide, it’s not just text messaging and voice messaging. Glide allows you to record video messages and send them to whoever’s on the receiving end.

Here's Glide at the Google Play download screen

Remember being a kid and seeing movies where people had video discussions? I remember seeing Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future 2 arguing with Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ character, Needles, through a wall-mounted TV screen. Isn’t it crazy to think that future has arrived? Well, kind of. I’m still waiting to be able to toss a tiny frozen pizza into a microwave and chow down on a gigantic pie only seconds later. 

Anyway, through apps like Glide (and Skype and a few others), video chatting is a great way to talk face to face with your kids back in Tampa or your grandkids in Dallas or your long-distance relationship in Honolulu.

3. Degusta Panama

Degusta Panama is a popular website that allows users to rate local restaurants on food, service, and ambiance. So, if you’re wanting Indian food tonight and you’re not sure where to go, check out Degusta and see where the nearest Indian restaurant is, and find out how others have rated it.

How does your favorite restaurant stack up against the others?

The only problem is the website is in Spanish, so if you don’t speak Spanish, you’ll just have to trust the 1-5 star system. If you want to check out the website, go to www.degustapanama.com before trying out the app.

4. Conversion

One thing that takes some getting used to in Panama, as least for those moving from the U.S., is the switch over to the metric system. If moving from the U.S., you won’t have an issue with currency conversion since Panama uses the U.S. dollar interchangeably with the Panama balboa (anyone else might need to use the currency converter in the app), but you’ll need to get used to using the metric system and dealing in measurements you’re not so familiar with. 

You can still get by using pounds at the deli or butcher, at least for now, but most meats are listed in price per kilogram. Gasoline is sold by the liter, your car gauge will probably list kilometers per hour, and your AC unit will more than likely read back the temperature in Celsius.

This conversion calculator is quite useful

For these reasons, a good conversion app can really come in handy. I have the app called Conversion installed on my phone and it works great for me. If you simply type in the word Conversion in the Google Play store you should find the one I’m using. Plenty of other conversion apps are available though, so find the one that works best for you. 

With the one I’m using, you can choose whether you’d like to deal with length/distance, mass/weight, temperature, currency, volume, fuel consumption rate, area, speed, or torque. Then you punch in the measurement you’re familiar with and see what it equals out to in the measurement you’re trying to figure out. It’s super simple and convenient.

5. Word Lens

Before anyone writes in saying how important it is to learn Spanish if you plan to move to Panama, I agree with you. I’m familiar with many Spanish words and have never actually needed to use this application, but Word Lens might be very helpful to someone just arriving to Panama and trying to get by on their own. It’s very easy to use and was free at the time I downloaded it. I’m not sure if it will remain free, so check that out before you download it.

Word Lens is a nifty little tool

How it works is, you choose the language you’ll be translating from and to, so for me I need Spanish translated to English. Then, you open up the app, which uses your camera, and simply hold it up to a sign that’s in Spanish, like you see in the photo above. It takes a few seconds and you’ll see the words switch back and forth a little bit while it calibrates,  but then right there in the lens you’ll see the construction sign, or whatever you’re focused on, switch to English. It’s really amazing. You don’t take a picture or anything, you just hold it up and focus on the sign, and it suddenly changes to English. I think it’s pretty cool.

6. Duolingo

You can get by in some areas of Panama, especially here in Panama City, by only speaking English, but at some point, it will be a good idea for you to learn Spanish. I’m still learning the language. I’ve played around with Rosetta Stone and some of the other programs, but I like Duolingo because it’s more like a social media/game app that teaches you Spanish (or whatever language you’re wanting to learn). 

It’s free and sends you daily reminder emails to ensure you keep up with your lessons. It’s a lot of fun and from what I’ve seen so far, it does a good job of teaching the basics.

DuoLingo keeps Spanish simple

If you’re wanting to learn a different language and you’re always on the go, Duolingo is an excellent app to have on your phone. You could sit in the Immigration office and practice Spanish instead of playing Sudoku. If you’d rather use the program on your computer, you can go to www.duolingo.com.

7. Cartelera Panama

I’m a movie buff and with 4 kids it seems I’m always checking online to find out what movies are playing, where they’re playing, when they’re playing, and whether they’re playing in English. Before downloading this app, I’d always search my phone's Internet for a theater by name, then go through the motions of getting to the list of movies and show times, only to find out the movie I wanted to see wasn’t playing in English or was only playing in 3D (I’m not a big fan of 3D movies—they give me headaches).

Find show times quickly with this app

With Cartelera Panama, I can search by movie title (to find out where it’s playing), or check out the different theaters and see the show times and language right there on the screen (SUB for English with Spanish subtitles or DOB for dubbed in Spanish). This isn’t the only movie theater app used in Panama, but it’s the one I have on my phone and it works fine for me.

8. TuChofer

This service may not be as low-cost as it would be to stick out your thumb and grab a passing taxi, but from what I’ve heard it’s a lot more reliable and probably a lot safer. I’ve never personally used TuChofer, but I’ve seen it mentioned in online forums and I do have it downloaded on my phone. 

It basically uses GPS to pinpoint your position, then lets you choose whether you’d like a sedan, an SUV, or whatever’s available to pick you up. Looking at my phone right now, from El Cangrejo, it’s telling me the cost is $1.50 at the start, plus $.80 per kilometer/$.25 per minute.

This is a great service and an awesome app because, you know if you’ve ever had to deal with taxis here, that prices vary by the driver (some are very honest, but most will try to gouge you) and some won’t even pick you up, depending on whether they’re already headed in the direction you’re going. Chances are, if you’re going out of their pre-determined flight plan, they’ll just shake their head and tell you, “No.” TuChofer helps make sure you get the ride you need by way of personal chauffeur.

9. Waze

I started using GPS years ago when I needed to learn my way around Chicago and I got so hooked on that device in my car that I’d use it everywhere I went, even to find the nearest Walmart or Long John Silvers. My only complaint with GPS was the fact that it showed me the most direct route to these places, but not always the safest—nothing like driving a family mini-van full of your kids through a very dangerous slum in Chicago.

When I moved to Panama, I was told by employees at several different stores in several different malls that my GPS system could be switched over to work in Panama. I didn’t do it because at that time, I didn’t trust that spending the $100 would be worth it. I didn’t believe a device could show me how to get around Panama. I mean this is a town where most driving directions consist of making turns at certain mini-supers, looking out for giant mango trees, and parking next to the giant rock. These are the types of references you might hear if asking where to go to pick up a date.

Five years later, through the Waze app, everyone in Panama is using GPS. I used mine for the first time recently, when trying to get to an extreme adventure park in Colon (if you haven’t seen the video, check it out HERE). I asked my brother-in-law for directions to the park and he said, “Dude, just trust Waze.” 

The problem was, I didn’t trust Waze. Reluctantly, I downloaded it and gave it a try (after getting lost first because I refused to try it in the first place). Within seconds of downloading the app, it zeroed in on my location and led me straight to the park. I’m a big fan now.

Road and traffic conditions are reported by Waze users

Waze can also tell you where there is major traffic or an accident you need to avoid, by allowing users to mark maps and warn other users. That’s pretty cool.

10. MagicApp by Magic Jack

I mention Magic Jack all the time in my budget breakdowns, because it’s a super affordable way to keep in contact with your friends and family members in the U.S. or in Canada or anywhere else in the world if the person is also hooked up to Magic Jack. 

Magic Jack lets you pick a U.S. or Canadian phone number, and through your Internet, you can set up a phone that will allow people to call you at that number. So, in essence, you could be living in Brazil with a Magic Jack set up with a Miami phone number and call a buddy living in China with the same set up.

Send and receive calls for free through MagicApp

So that was the old news about Magic Jack. Now, Magic Jack is offering a one-year free service for cell phones. So, even if you don’t own an actual Magic Jack device, you can download the app and pick a phone number to use with your cell. Or, if you do already own a device and want to keep the same number, you can do that too. I have the same number installed on a landline and on my cell phone. So, if my dad in Tulsa wants to call me, he dials that Miami number I chose, and it will ring here to my landline phone and my cell phone at the same time.

This is amazing news for expats because you can speak to friends and family members completely free right now (no more phone cards). After the first year, I think the price is going to go up to $7 or $8. 

Still, for a year of service, that’s awesome. The only thing you’ll need to keep in mind is the amount of data you’ve paid for on your cell phone plan. Data will be used like with any other app. If you’re hooked up to WiFi (I just bought a router for my house for less than $40), you don’t even have to worry about that as long as you’re in a WiFi hotspot.

11. iTranslate

As I mentioned earlier, Google Translate works very well here, but if you’re looking for an alternative, iTranslate seems to be one of the best translation apps out there. I found it listed on several “Best Apps" web articles. 

The voice translation feature on this app can be very useful

I have it downloaded on my phone and have played around with it a little bit. It allows you to type a message in English and have it translated to other languages. Or you can speak into your phone and have it translated to Spanish (or whatever language you need), so it will play back in Spanish. Like Google Translate, the translations might not always come out perfect, but it’s still a helpful app. You have to know that you won't get an accurate translation if you ask something like, "Where do ya keep the doohickeys?"

12. Easy Taxi

Like TuChofer, Easy Taxi zeroes in on your location using your phone’s GPS capabilities, and allows you to order a taxi to come pick you up. It also allows you to manually type in your pick up address. 

If you’re out on Calle 50 in the middle of the day, you might not need an app like this as cabs are constantly zipping down the street. However, if you live in a small neighborhood like where I live in the Chanis area, being able to easily order a cab to come pick you up is quite convenient.

Not only location can hinder your ability to find a cab. Time of day is also a factor. If it’s noon on a Friday, you’ll see plenty of taxis around, but if you leave for work at 4am, or need a safe ride home from a bar at 2am, Easy Taxi is a great tool to have.

13. MB Panama

During your first trip to Panama, you might be reluctant to get on a bus or on the new Metro train. Plus, both of these means of public transportation require riders to have a pay card before boarding, so you’ll need to set yourself up with one of those cards with pre-loaded funds before you can make use of these convenient systems.

However, once you’re here for a little while, you may find that using the new air-conditioned buses and riding the Metro train are both excellent and quite affordable ways of getting around. 

I purposely drop my car at the Pueblo Nuevo station and catch the train anytime I need to get to El Cangrejo for a meeting or to Hospital Nacional. I was in traffic just the other day on Via Transistmica and decided to ditch my car and get out of the thick bumper-to-bumper madness. Ten minutes later I was at my destination. How much did it cost? Thirty-five cents.

I tell you all this, because taking taxis all the time can be a costly, and time-consuming, way of maneuvering around your new city. Click HERE to read my article on using the new Metro train to find out more on the subject. 

Keep track of your transportation funds with this app

Download the MB Panama app if you want an easy way to keep track of the funds you have left on your card. With MB Panama, you just punch in the number on your card (or scan the barcode if you have a card with a barcode—mine doesn’t have one) and it’ll tell you how much money you have left on the card.

14. SaldoExpress Panama

This app didn’t work for me this morning, the first time I actually depended on it, but others find it very useful so it might’ve just been a fluke or downtime with the system. This is similar to MB Panama, but it tells you how much money you have available on your Corredor Norte and Corredor Sur cards (two of the major toll highways here).

Why is this convenient? Well, unless you have the PanaPass (which is a computerized system that automatically deducts funds from your account through a device placed on your car windshield, and allows you to go through an exclusive, quick pass line) you’ll have to choose from one of two lines at the corredor. 

You have to have a card to use the corredor (just like the bus and train system). If you need to reload funds (the minimum amount you can reload with is $5), you’ll have to go through the line that says recarga. This is the slowest lane as each driver in line is recharging their card, which means digging through their wallet for a bill and then waiting for change).

This will tell you the balance on both of your corredor cards

If you’re confident you have funds on your card, you can go through one of the faster lines where you just swipe your card and go on through. You don’t want to make the mistake of going through that line without funds on your card as you’ll tick off every driver behind you and will probably get a ticket from the traffic cops on duty. 

I don’t use the corredor very often so when I do, I usually can’t remember if I have money on my card. This app, if it works next time, will allow me to check ahead of time.

15. Visit Panama Official Guide

This app, run by the tourism board of Panama, is a great way to get basic info about Panama, right at your fingertips. Rather than search your phone’s Internet to find out what the weather is usually like on the Azuero Peninsula, or to get the names of all the provinces here, just download this app and easily get info like that whenever you need it.

This is a great website/app to get you started in Panama

This app also has some neat videos about Panama. If you want to check the website before downloading the app to your phone, just go to www.visitpanama.com.

16. Taximetro Panama

Ok, so I lied a little. I guess I have 16 Panama related apps. This one is great, but I'm a little weary about using it.

Basically, Taximetro Panama lets you choose your location and your destination, then you choose how many passengers will be in the cab, and whether or not you’re calling for a taxi (can be a little more expensive) or not (which means you’ll be flagging one down on the street). Then it calculates how much you should pay for your ride.

The reason I’m not 100% comfortable with this app is the costs quoted for rides seem way too low to me. In a lot of places in Panama, Panamanians can get from point A to point B for less than $3. However, getting from where I live in Chanis to Albrook Mall would cost quite a bit. I know I had to argue with several drivers at Albrook one time, drivers who wanted to charge me $15-$20 for the ride. I think I finally talked them down to $10. 

According to this app, I should’ve only paid $2.80. That seems very low to me, but if you look at the following link, which lists the price charts for taxis here, http://www.transito.gob.pa/tarifas_taxi.php, it seems the $2.80 is accurate, which means I got ripped off, lol.

Getting a driver to take you to 24 de Diciembre would be

very difficult...unless he's already headed in that direction

Still, even with the chart and this app, I think getting a driver to take you from Albrook to Chanis for $2.80 would be nearly impossible, until the authorities start doing undercover cab busts and enforcing those charts they post.

Quick Tip: If you’re ever at a mall, don’t catch a cab at one of the mall doors. Leave the mall, walk out to a regular street, and take a taxi from there. Drivers at Multiplaza tried to charge me $15 to go a short distance. I walked out to Cincuentenario, one of the main streets in the area, and ended up paying $3.

I’ll stop numbering these now as from this point on I’ll just tell you about apps that I think are useful no matter where you’re living.

Amazon Kindle

You may already have an e-book reader on your phone, but since Amazon’s platform seems to be one of the most widely used, I think it’s pretty cool that there’s a Kindle app for Android (and probably for iPhone too). When I first moved to Panama, I wanted nothing to do with an e-reader device. I loved having an actual book in hand. I still do. But the harsh reality is, it’s not easy finding affordable reading material in English here.

Yes, there are stores that sell books in English and many that sell English-language magazines. However, your selection will be very limited and the cost will be higher than you’re probably wanting to pay. A paperback that might cost $8 on the Costco shelf in the U.S. would probably go for $15 here. 

Having a Kindle or Nook or any other e-book reading device means you can shop and immediately read books in an instant. I love sitting on the beach with an actual book in my hand, but Kindle is so convenient that I’m much more likely to download a book and grab my Kindle on the fly. I had mine with me at the Immigration office this morning.

You can even buy my novel for your Kindle app

With the Kindle App, you can read books right on your phone (and if you haven’t already, you can download my novel for Kindle for only $.99 by clicking HERE). Sorry, I have to shamelessly promote my book from time to time, and since I’m almost ready to publish Book 2, it’s about time to start pushing my books again.

Wunderlist

When visiting Panama, or for just living out your daily life, lists can be very handy. I found this app at some technology website a long time ago, and have started to rely on it a lot. Wunderlist is awesome because, unlike the regular phone notepad, it allows you to create lists, put items on your list, and then check them off as you complete them.

I use it for lists of movies I want to see, grocery shopping lists, and daily to-do lists. Keeping up with Panama For Real, especially the pesky site maintenance stuff, is a full-time job, and it’s easy to forget things, so Wunderlist helps a lot. As I complete tasks, I click on them and they move down to a completed tasks area. Then, if I decide that I didn’t quite complete it like I thought, I can tap it again and it’ll move back up into my list. I even used it for Christmas shopping.

Create easy "to-do" lists with this app

Marlene tried it and immediately tossed it to the side because she didn’t like how it makes you sign in using your Facebook or Google account. That kind of thing doesn’t bother me though. It’s kind of the way things are now. Even Pinterest and Amazon and Goodreads ask if you want to log in with your Facebook account.

So, if you have a Panama shopping list or maybe you’re traveling from Panama back to Canada to visit family and you want to put together a list of things to pick up while you’re there (and trust me, live here long enough and you’ll have a list of things you want to bring back with you, like sugar-free Twizzlers. Sorry, that’s on my list, probably not on yours), this app can be helpful.

Pocket

Have you ever been browsing through Facebook or any other site and saw an article you’d really like to read, but you just didn’t have the time at that moment? This happened to be recently. I saw a Facebook post about a housing development opening up, and I was interested in finding out more, but I was on the go and knew that by the time I got back to Facebook, that article would be buried below everyone else’s posts.

When I got home, I searched and searched and finally figured out who’d posted it in the first place and was able to locate it again. Then, once I clicked on the link and went to the developer’s website, I bookmarked it, which is probably what many of you would do with a web page you like.

Then, I found out about this app called Pocket, which I think is much more convenient. If you ever click on a link and like a page and want to save it, you simply choose to share it on your phone (like when it asks if you want to share it on Facebook or Pinterest or Whatsapp…whatever) and instead of choosing one of those other apps, choose Pocket. It will then save it to a pocket, just like putting money in your pocket for later.

Saved to the pocket

According to the app, the info will remain in your pocket even if the original website closes down or takes the page off or something like that. I just saved a web page about life hacks that I thought were really cool, so I can go back to it later. In Pocket, you can tag each saved site. So if you want to look later through job related articles or funny articles, you just choose the tag with the articles you want to see.

Relax Melodies

Sometimes, especially in a place like Panama City, where the constant honking of horns and construction noise are a norm, you just need a little bit of R and R. I love this app and I know there are tons of others like it, but this one is good enough for me.

With Relaxing Melodies you can choose from a list of soothing sounds and just kick back and relax. You can either listen to one sound or mix them up and create a symphony of peaceful tunes. I just counted 44 sounds in this app, which includes things like thunderstorm, grandfather clock, monk chant, cat purring, seaside, rain on the roof, humming, campfire, melody, zen, and the list goes on and on.

Tap on rain, flute, and thunder for a stormy Native American sound

I’ve used this app to help get the kids to chill out. I can’t use it when I’m writing or I’ll end up with my forehead hitting the keyboard. Not good.

Zombie Tsunami

Lastly, sometimes you just need to go a little crazy, like this morning while dealing with the Panama Immigration office, and you’d like nothing more than to turn into a cartoon rage zombie and eat everything in sight.

You can even link this game with your Facebook friends and eat them

I don’t play a lot of games. I’m kind of a workaholic, so when I’m not writing something, I’m planning on writing something, or thinking of how I can plan to write something. I saw my daughter playing this game one day and a few minutes later I’d snatched the phone from her hand and had my little green zombies with afro wigs chomping down pedestrians.

I have to warn you though, this game is addictive. Don’t take my word for it. Give it a try. 

That's it for my list of Panama-friendly apps. I hope you find it helpful. Don't forget to check out http://www.PanamaForReal.com.

And please like PFR on Facebook too at: http://www.Facebook.com/PanamaForReal. 

Oh and subscribe to us and share us on Youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6N7Ih2bjD0FjOBnDg_-Flg

Thanks for reading,

Chris